Chemo, Radiation and Prayers....Oh My!

So we aren’t exactly traveling to Oz on the Yellow Brick road, but we are traveling down a path that continues to bring change, anxiety and concerns.  Thankfully we are not in search of a heart on this journey…..our family is all heart!  A search for courage is not necessary…...dad has displayed courage throughout this enitre ordeal.  As for a brain….that seems somewhat ironic since we are dealing with brain cancer.   And alas, we know there is no powerful wizard in Oz to cure our troubles.  What we do have is our faith in God who is the ultimate healer!

To catch you up, dad met with the oncologist last Friday and received the anticipated news that his next chemotherapy session will be his last session before moving on to radiation.  He will go back into the hospital on April 2^nd .  The unexpected news was that he was getting three weeks off between treatments instead of the normal two weeks.  The extended ‘vacation’ is due to the national shortage of the methotrexate that is used in his course of treatment.  The availability of this drug may mean the difference between life and death for cancer patients across the United States.   Let me pause here to give a great big thank you (NOT)  to all of the greedy and non-compliant drug manufacturers that have contributed to the drug shortage,  and in fact are responsible for this crisis.  I hope the executives of these companies are able to sleep well at night and do not have loved ones who are in need of the drug for treatment.  I digress….

 During our initial meeting with the oncologist we listened as he described the protocol he would use to treat dad’s cancer.  The treatment is based on his type of cancer, location and dad’s age.   Therefore, we have known from the beginning that the expected treatment would be chemotherapy, radiation and intraventricular chemotherapy….in that order.  Those combined treatments offer the best chance of successful results.   So it’s a little bittersweet that dad will finish this first phase after his next chemo treatment and then we move on to radiation.  Realizing when I say ‘we’ it really is ‘he’….He is the one enduring the treatments, bravely moving on, finding the strength to face the ongoing treatments.  One thing you can be certain of is that ‘WE’ will be right there with him every step of the way.   At the moment we have very little information about the radiation treatment.  With some persuasion dad was convinced ( he may say forced) to proceed with scheduling an appointment with the radiation oncologist.  A smart decision by the ‘girls’ since available appointment was several weeks out.  He, I mean we, will be meeting with him mid-April.  I struggle with wanting to know more about the radiation treatmen vs. remaining clueless until we really have to know.    Maybe it is my own coping mechanism but I really want to focus on just taking one step at a time and facing one challenge at a time.  I am not one to relinquish control easily but in this case I know that God is in control and I need to take rest in that.  In the meantime my prayers for complete healing will continue!

I have had this blog forming in my head for a few days now and when I get to work today my desk calendar verse says:

The Lord hears good people when they cry out to him, and he saves them from all their troubles.  ~Psalm 34:17

I love when God puts someone or something in my path that reaffirms that HE is in control, HE is big enough and HE is all we need! 

An Anniversary of Sorts......

Yesterday marked the 4 month anniversary of dad's being admitted to the hospital with an inoperable brain tumor.   It marked the fourth month of us learning to live with a new 'normal'.....that is if living with brain cancer and enduring the endless trips for labs, chemotherapy and long hospital stays can be considered normal.  Life in the meantime has become at least somewhat routine.  You learn the ropes pretty quickly when you are a frequent flier patient! 

For example, we have learned that for trips to the clinic you can pretty much anticipate a little bit of a wait, especially when you have afternoon labs.  You can also expect to see a pretty diverse group of people in the waiting room... the young, the old, men and women.  Cancer does not discriminate.   It's hard not to think about what each person might be experiencing at that moment.  Is this their first visit?  What kind of cancer are they fighting?  What kind of prognosis have they been given?  Do they have family support?  Some patients like to chat and visit while others keep to themselves.  Sometimes the faces and body language of those who remain silent speak volumes.  My prayers go out to all that find themselves in that waiting room.

At the hospital our family has become 'old pros' so to speak.  We have the registration process down to a science.  I pick dad up Monday morning and take him to the hospital while mom takes Cameron to school for me.  She meets us there and if it's a good day we are already in the room when she arrives.  (Today the registrar saw dad walk in and had his forms ready for me when I came through the door...how is that for service?) We make our way to his assigned room and the 'normal' routine begins.  The nurse and tech make their introductions, they ask the seemingly endless intake questions and then dad gets settled into his pj's. I might add that they are much more stylish than those flimsy hospital gowns!   Our newest normal includes a MRI scan prior to chemo treatment.  This allows the doctor to review the progress.  Once MRI is completed it's just a waiting game before the drugs begin to flow.  In the meantime, mom has settled in with rolling suitcase and pantry along with some of the other comforts of home...phone, laptop and reading materials.  Seriously if we have to do many more of these trips I think we should consider bringing in some nice colored throw rugs, a cute decorative lamp and some throw pillows to make the place really homey!  For the time being we will instead make due with moving furniture as we see fit, requesting a roll-away bed and de-pillowing the place.  Today's room had 7 extra pillows! 

As you see today marks the beginning of a 'normal' week at the hospital.  Mom will stay with dad night and day because that is who she is....the ultimate caregiver!  She will be keeping up with the labs and results in our own 'Medical Record' binder, making frequent  trips to the ice machine because she is that familiar with the layout of the floor, and strolling out for an  occasional trip to the car to grab a new outfit.   The 'normal' also includes Amy and I  making daily visits to love on our mom and pops and make sure they are both being taken care of properly.  Who can do that better than daughters right?  Bringing food, movies and stories from the workplace...trying to keep things normal.   


While four months seems like a short time it also can seem like a lifetime when learning to live with the new normal.  And really who wants to celebrate this kind of anniversary right?  Well let me answer that for you....Me!   I want to celebrate that we have had another four months.  I want to celebrate how far we have come.  I want to celebrate that as a family we have stuck together and somehow forged a new 'normal' life.   But mostly I want to celebrate the love I have for my dad and the rest of my family.   My love is one thing that didn't have to change to a new normal!

The love of a family is life's greatest blessing!

I can do everything through him who gives me strength.  Philippians 4:13